I feel like I got the S#@! kicked out of me!!

It’s kind of like a death-you know it’s coming but there is no way to prepare. I kept focusing on the present moment and enjoying it. I even made it through high school graduation it was such a happy time. Had a blast over the summer and a wonderful vacation. It was time to pack up and make the trip from Ohio to Florida. Spent special time together and wonderful memories to last a lifetime. Especially the car trip down. I don’t think we had spent that much time together in such close quarters since I gave birth to him in the hospital.

Then it came DORM MOVE IN DAY. We had 1 hour to unload, then move the car and set up-the 2 of us. Here we go! After we unloaded the car had to be moved from its prime parking location. I had my son move it as I began to reorganize the furniture in the room to be more efficient to maximize space-damn these shoeboxes are small!! He came back and immediately put everything back to where it originally was later realizing he had no room to put the storage organizers we had bought and that there was a method to my madness. He wanted nothing for his walls in the beginning -but did end up keeping everything I had bought except the -SATURDAY IS FOR THE BOYS -flag which one of his roommates gladly took. We set up in 3 hours-some students with entire families took 8 hours!!! It was time to say goodbye and I did not do bad-but knew it was not the final goodbye as my daughter and my ex-husband were flying down and the 4 of us hanging out all weekend. It was nice as he could get acclimated being that far from home-hang out with roommates during day and us at night. I did look him in the eye and go You are 1.8 miles from the beach and every girl has a belly shirt on -don’t make me regret this!!

Then it was departure day. I had a pit in my stomach at brunch. I knew what was coming. As we approached Fort Lauderdale airport my eyes welled with tears and my anxiety peaked. I was trying to stay strong for him as I could see the same in him. I did not have his courage and bravery as I went to college a stone’s throw from home. He pulled up to departures and it was time to get out of the car. My daughter fast asleep in the back of the car. Time to say goodbye. With tears in both of our eyes I said Make choices that make you happy and keep you safe. My daughter gave him a 1-armed hug and goes see ya later! I walked in the airport bawling my eyes out, hands in the air at security still a mess. We got through security and my daughter goes see you at the gate I’m not dealing with this. A complete stranger gave me a hug-a very long one- which was all I needed.

Everyone has their story to tell of when the first bird left the nest and that’s mine. My daughter left a year later and for me it was definitely more difficult when she left as it was official -I was an empty nester and the chapter of life the one I most enjoyed, of raising my kids-was officially over. I was in mourning over it. Many people I have spoken to all felt the same. Some were not phased and looking forward to adventures with their spouse and reconnection. There is no right or wrong.

What will your next chapter bring?