Move-in is over.

The parents have left. The dorm room is unpacked. The roommate introductions have happened.

And then comes something that doesn’t get nearly enough attention:

The first weekend at college.

For many freshmen, this is the first time they are truly on their own without classes, parents or a familiar routine filling their day.

It can be exciting.

It can also be lonely, awkward and overwhelming.

And while one weekend certainly won’t determine a student’s entire college experience, what freshmen do during those first few days can help set the tone for the weeks ahead.

Here’s why the first weekend matters—and what freshmen should do with it.

1. Don’t Spend the Entire Weekend in Your Dorm Room

Your room may feel like the safest place on campus right now.

But staying there all weekend makes it much harder to meet people.

Keep your door open when you’re comfortable doing so. Sit in the common area. Walk around campus. Go to the dining hall instead of eating alone in your room.

You don’t need to be outgoing.

You just need to be visible and available for connection.

2. Say Yes More Than You Normally Would

Someone on your floor asks if you want to get dinner?

Go.

Your roommate wants to walk around campus?

Go.

There’s a welcome event that sounds slightly awkward?

Go anyway.

During the first weekend, nearly everyone is looking for someone to do something with—even the students who seem completely confident.

This is one of the easiest times in college to simply say:

“Can I come too?”

3. Don’t Worry About Finding “Your People” Yet

You might meet someone during your first weekend who becomes your best friend.

Or you might not.

Both are completely normal.

The people you spend your first weekend with don’t have to become your lifelong friend group.

College friendships develop over time through classes, clubs, dorm life, activities and countless random encounters.

The goal this weekend isn’t to find your future wedding party.

It’s simply to meet people.

4. Eat With Other People

Dining halls can be intimidating when you don’t know anyone.

Go anyway.

Ask your roommate to eat with you. Text someone you met at orientation. Ask the person across the hall.

And if you’re heading to eat, invite someone else.

“I’m going to grab lunch. Want to come?”

Fourteen simple words can be the beginning of a friendship.

5. Go to the Events Your College Planned

Yes, some freshman welcome events can feel cheesy.

Go.

Colleges intentionally schedule activities during the first weekend because they know students need opportunities to connect.

Movie nights, concerts, games, club fairs, cookouts, sporting events and residence hall activities give students something to do besides sit in their rooms wondering what everyone else is doing.

You don’t have to love every event.

Just show up.

6. Be Careful With Alcohol

For some students, the first weekend can also bring their first real exposure to college parties.

There can be pressure to drink more than you’re comfortable with simply because you want to fit in.

You don’t have to.

If you do choose to go out, stay with people you trust, keep track of your own drink, don’t accept an open drink from someone you don’t know, and don’t leave a friend behind.

And remember:

You never have to drink just because everyone around you appears to be drinking.

7. Don’t Let Social Media Convince You Everyone Else Is Having More Fun

This one is huge.

You may open Instagram or Snapchat and see students from your high school surrounded by new friends.

Meanwhile, you’re sitting on your dorm bed wondering whether you made a terrible mistake.

Don’t compare your real first weekend with someone else’s carefully selected pictures.

That smiling group photo doesn’t tell you whether those students are homesick, nervous or wondering if anyone actually likes them.

Everyone is adjusting.

Some people are simply better at hiding it.

8. Learn Your Campus

Use some of the weekend to figure out where you’re going before Monday morning.

Find your classrooms.

Locate the library.

Figure out where the gym is.

Find the student center.

Learn where you can grab coffee or a quick meal.

Walk your Monday schedule if you need to.

Knowing where you’re going can eliminate one unnecessary source of stress when classes begin.

9. Call Home—But Don’t Spend the Entire Weekend There

Call your parents.

They want to know you’re alive.

Seriously.

But don’t spend hours FaceTiming your family or constantly texting your friends from home because you’re uncomfortable.

It’s okay to miss home.

It’s also important to give your new life a chance.

Stay connected to the people you love while making room for new people too.

10. If You’re Lonely, Don’t Assume You Made the Wrong Choice

This may be the most important thing freshmen need to hear.

Feeling lonely during your first weekend does not mean you chose the wrong college.

It doesn’t mean everyone else has friends except you.

And it definitely doesn’t mean your entire college experience will feel this way.

You have been there for a few days.

Give yourself time.

Friendships rarely happen on a schedule.

A Note for Parents

This weekend can be difficult for you too.

You may be staring at your phone waiting for a text.

And when that text finally comes, it may say:

“I hate it here.”

Don’t panic.

Listen. Ask questions. Encourage your student to leave their room, attend an event, grab a meal with someone or talk to their RA.

Try not to solve every uncomfortable moment for them.

Sometimes the best thing a parent can say is:

“I know this feels hard right now. Give yourself a chance. What is one thing you could do tonight?”

Then let them try.

The Bottom Line

The first weekend at college isn’t important because students need to make their best friends, attend the perfect party or have the greatest weekend of their lives.

It matters because it’s their first opportunity to begin creating a life on campus.

Leave the dorm room.

Say hello.

Accept the invitation.

Invite someone to eat.

Go to the event.

Explore campus.

And if the weekend isn’t amazing?

That’s okay too.

College isn’t decided in one weekend.

But showing up during that first one is a pretty good place to start.